Contributors

Monday, March 19, 2007

Profiles In Courage Volume 8: A Voice of Reason

Four years ago today, our country embarked on what will be remembered as the biggest failing in our history. In an effort to "take the fight to Al Qaeda," President Bush invaded Iraq on March 19, 2003. Since that day, I have written many words on here about why Iraq has been a colossal blunder. I went from supporting the war in the beginning to seeing unconscionable actions by this administration result in disaster. I have listened to lie after lie about how we are "doing" in Iraq and tried to understand the people who still support this war.

A few weeks ago I started working on an anniversary piece on the Iraq invasion. After a few paragraphs, I realized that I was repeating myself and should probably come up with something else. On the evening of March 10 I sat down to watch one of my favorite programs, Real Time with Bill Maher, and the first guest said something which made me fall out of my chair. I was shocked for three reasons. First, he was a general. Second, he said something I didn't think it was possible for a general to say, which was:

"We've got this thing that so many military believe that Republican administrations are good for the military. That is rarely the case. And, we have to get a message through to every soldier, every family member, every friend of soldiers that the Republican party, the Republican dominated Congress has absolutely been the worst thing that's happened to the United States Army and the United States Marine Corps."

and third, he was the man who by many is considered to be the father of the Iraq Army. So I decided I would tell his story and let the General, who knows Iraq very well, comment on where we are at with "things" in Iraq four years later.

Major General Paul D. Eaton was born in Weatherford, OK and has served in the United States military for 32 years. Throughout his career he has received the following medals: Distinguished Service Medal, Defense Superior Service Medal, Legion of Merit (with 3 Oak Leaf Clusters), Meritorious Service Medal (with 2 Oak Leaf Clusters), Army Commendation Medal (with 2 Oak Leaf Clusters) and the Army Achievement Medal just to name a few. In June of 2003, General Eaton took over as Commanding General, Coalition Military Assistance Training Team, Baghdad, Iraq which essentially means he was tasked to build the Iraqi Army. In less than a year, he built an infrastructure out of nothing creating an army of a 27-battalion, nine-brigade, three-division army and air force, navy, coastal defense force, civil defense corps, police service, facilities protection service, border police force, customs police force, immigration police force, national security police force and a diplomatic protection service officers force.

Some would argue that General Eaton failed in his task when he ended his tour of duty in June of 2004. Violence in Iraq has spiraled out of control and the country is currently engaged in a civil war. I say he was handed a bag of shit from Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld and told to turn it into a steak dinner for 27 million people, a highly improbable task. In the end, he did the best he could possibly do.

When he retired from service in 2005, General Eaton became one of the first voices in what eventually became a chorus of military personnel who began to speak out about how poorly this war has been managed. In recent editorials, Eaton has said that the Iraq War can't be won militarily and there must be a "diplomatic surge" to secure peace. Naturally, he was criticized for being a "traitor" and a "pawn of the left." I find this to be odd as all the information about Paul Eaton that I got was from official military web sites which unanimously sung his praises and service.

On March 10, 2007, the stunning condemnation that General Eaton delivered on Real Time, which can be seen on video and in its entirety at the conclusion of this column, gave me hope that people of good faith, service, and reason can finally start speaking truth to power. For all the polls that say that most people are against this war, we still have just enough people that support it to keep it going. Everyone needs to realize that President Bush, Dick Cheney, and their mindless sychophants have NOT been fighting the "War on Terror." They have used 9-11 to systematically take away most of our civil liberties, destroy the constitutional balance of power, and waste countless American and Iraqi lives while spending billions of dollars, most of which went to their own friends in the corporate world. The disgust that I feel for these disgraceful people whom we call our "leaders" is unfathmable; they are an embarassment of biblical proportions and my children will have to endure the irrevocable harm that they have inflicted on our great nation.

Are there any more Paul Eatons out there in the world? Raise your voices, proud men and women, and tell your stories.

General Paul D. Eaton on Bill Maher

Monday, March 12, 2007

Great Bunch A Guys

It's been awhile since I have written about the firearm lobby. You know the fellas I am talking about....the ones who wish they could do what I do at least three times a week...if they could only get it up without a gun.

Last Sunday I read Dennis Anderson's weekly column in the Star and Tribune and saw what is perhaps the finest example of the pure psychotic paranoia of these dickheads. Jim Zumbo, an avid outdoors man, columnist, and popular host on the Outdoor Channel, has been ex-communicated from the cabal of gun boys. It all started on February 19th when he wrote:

I must be living in a vacuum. The guides on our hunt tell me that the use of AR and AK rifles have a rapidly growing following among hunters, especially prairie dog hunters. I had no clue. Only once in my life have I ever seen anyone using one of these firearms. I call them "assault" rifles, which may upset some people. Excuse me, maybe I'm a traditionalist, but I see no place for these weapons among our hunting fraternity. I'll go so far as to call them "terrorist" rifles. They tell me that some companies are producing assault rifles that are "tack drivers."

Sorry, folks, in my humble opinion, these things have no place in hunting. We don't need to be lumped into the group of people who terrorize the world with them, which is an obvious concern. I've always been comfortable with the statement that hunters don't use assault rifles. We've always been proud of our "sporting firearms." This really has me concerned. As hunters, we don't need the image of walking around the woods carrying one of these weapons. To most of the public, an assault rifle is a terrifying thing. Let's divorce ourselves from them. I say game departments should ban them from the prairies and woods.

Within 36 hours of this post on his blog, Zumbo was fired as spokesman for Remington, fired as Outdoor Channel employee, fired by Outdoor Life magazine for which he worked for over 40 years, and his blog removed from the Outdoor Life website.

Dennis Anderson, our very own outdoor columnist and avid hunter had this to say:

What's going on here? Can't a person -- particularly someone who has long supported anything and everything to do with the "outdoors" (including conservation) -- express an opinion without losing a career?

The answer is no, Dennis, a person can't. The reason for this is that the people who run the gun lobby are a group of mentally ill Nazis who are so insecure about anyone expressing an opinion that wavers even slightly from canon that any small step out of line is meet with extreme punishment. This is how they have always been and will always operate. It's how pretty much all conservatives seem to operate these days. None of this comes as a shock to me at all. Hell, I am surprised that didn't just shoot Jim Zumbo in the head with an AR or AK rifle.

Zumbo's biggest mistake was not dissing the rifles themselves but warning hunters of becoming just like terrorists. Huh. Imagine that. Wasn't it yours truly who has been called "nuts" and "paranoid" and "a traitor" by several neocons who post on this blog for saying the exact same thing? And now, here we have a member of an atypical conservative group stating what is very plainly the truth and look at what happened to him. Tell me again that I am nuts. Speak to me again about how my opinions about conservatives are inaccurate. Please explain to me how I am the irrational one, in the face of this complete bullshit, and am only presenting part of the truth.

His comments obviously struck a chord in nuttersville and, in the end, truly illustrate a mindset that is extremely dangerous. On almost every conservative issue, there is no wavering. That is a sign of weakness. No matter how awful the results of any action, conservatives must stay the course, not give in, and not allow any dissent. Iraq is an example of this. Our current "fuck you, we're better" approach to international relations is an example of this. Health Care, Education, the Environment, Homeland Security....have only one way to be handled and that's the "Right" way.

And we all better fall in line otherwise we'll end up like Jim Zumbo.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

The Numbers Are In!

Thanks to one of my intrepid readers I have some wonderful statistics to share with all of you. On March 2nd, the three major news networks coverage of Anna Nicole Smith and the Walter Reed Scandal were totalled.

CNN made 40 references to Anna Nicole Smith and 53 to the Walter Reed Scandal. MSNBC made 96 references to Anna Nicole Smith and 84 to the Walter Reed Scandal.

and Fox News....my oh my.....121 references to Anna Nicole Smith and 10 to the Walter Reed Scandal. Bwaa Haa Haa. Are you fucking kidding me?

Someone who thinks that Fox News is a real news channel please post in comments. C'mon, I double dog dare ya!!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

How the Republican Media is trying to bury Walter Reed Story

Really? Nah...the couldn't, could they?

How many Anna Nicole Smith videos and how many Walter Reed videos?

Yeah, talk to me some more about the "liberal" media....

Support Our Tr..oo.....um....wait a minute...

On February 15, 2004 John Kerry said the following at a primary debate:

"President Bush cut the VA (Veterans Administration) budget and is not kept faith with veterans across this country. And one of the first definitions of patriotism is keeping faith with those who wore the uniform of our country.”

He was laughed at by every neocon from here to Timbuktu because, as I'm sure you are all aware, Democrats don't care about the troops. Why would anything a traitor like John Kerry says be true anyway?

On March 19, 2005 President Bush cut $350 million dollars from the federal budget for veterans, specifically in the area of home funding which amounts to about 5000 medical beds for our troops. The Governor of Pennsylvania, Ed Rendell, a Democrat, said this was unconscionable. Neocons accused Governor Rendell of being a traitor and not supporting the troops by criticizing the president.

On February 13, 2007 President Bush again proposed cutting part of the budget for veterans starting in 2009 and continuing through 2010 in the hopes of balancing the budget by 2012. Democrats again raised concerns about how our troops are our greatest treasure and the sacrifices they make should be repaid in kind. I remember asking a neocon friend of mine at a party about how he, as a veteran, felt about the cuts. He told me that Democrats lie about everything, no one cares more about the troops than Republicans, and it was his job, as a soldier, to kill any Democrat that came into his gun sight.

In the last two weeks, most of the major media began running stories about conditions at Walter Reed hospital. Pictures and video showed black mold in the bathrooms, mouse droppings on the floors everywhere, and holes in just about every wall in the place. Soldiers, heretofore afraid to speak out, began telling stories of the rotten medical care they have received since serving in Iraq and Afghanistan. Other military hospitals around the country have now been called to the mat, as several soldiers have cited similar conditions. Maj. Gen. George Weightman, who oversaw Walter Reed, was fired immediately. Last week, Army Secretary Francis J. Harvey also resigned in what many have finally come to see as the most appalling fuck up of Bush Co's tenure in the White House.

Yes, that's right. You heard me correctly. This is Bush Co's fault. They decided we should go into Iraq and quite obviously didn't plan for how taxed the veteran's health care system would be. In fact, they made matters worse but cutting funding for programs that were already underfunded and thus, people like Cpl. Wendell McLeod were treated like animals. "This is how we treat our soldiers -- we give them nothing," Annette McLeod, wife of Cpl. McLeod said. "They're good enough to go and sacrifice their life, and we give them nothing."

Ms. McLeod is one many voices of veteran's families that I hope can be heard. These are the people that the right wing media ignore, spewing more of their lies and hate about how Democrats "don't support the troops." Neocons inability to look at these stories boggles my mind and is, in the end I guess, completely expected by a group of people who regularly accuse liberals as being out of touch with reality while they are, in fact, living life at fucking Disneyland.

The policies of George W Bush have been idiotic, incompetent, and utterly unkind which, quite honestly, I think is being polite. For him to stand up in front of the public and say he cares about the troops has now been categorically proven to be one of the greatest lies in the history of our country. The pictures and videos I have seen are nauseating, to the say the least, and I was so far beyond appalled by this it was hard for me to know where to begin. So I started with the man who might have been president whose words from three years ago ended up being exactly true.

I wonder what else he was right about?

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Ah, Hunter...

A reader sent me this quote over email yesterday. I miss Hunter S. Thompson...his acerbic wit, his assholeishness, his complete command the English language, and his honesty. This was written shortly before his death in 2005.

"We have become a Nazi monster in the eyes of the whole world -- a nation of bullies and bastards who would rather kill than live peacefully. We are not just Whores for power and oil, but killer whores with hate and fear in our hearts. We are human scum, and that is how history will judge us. No redeeming social value. Just whores. Get out of our way, or we'll kill you. Well, shit on that dumbness, George W. Bush does not speak for me or my son or my mother or my friends or the people I respect in this world. We didn't vote for these cheap, greedy little killers who speak for America today -- and we will not vote for them again in 2002. Or 2004. Or ever. Who does vote for these dishonest shitheads? Who among us can be happy and proud of having all this innocent blood on our hands? Who are these swine? These flag-sucking half-wits who get fleeced and fooled by stupid rich kids like George Bush? They are the same ones who wanted to have Muhammad Ali locked up for refusing to kill gooks. They speak for all that is cruel and stupid and vicious in the American character. They are the racists and hate mongers among us -- they are the Ku Klux Klan. I piss down the throats of these Nazis. And I am too old to worry about whether they like it or not. Fuck them."

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Special Comment

One of my regular readers sent this to me and I thought it was pretty accurate. Enjoy!

Monday, February 26, 2007

Aargh!!!

Alright, I can't take it anymore. And I am tired of being nice. The last few days have made me unbearably ashamed of our country....aggravating me to the point of nuclear acid reflex syndrome. So I must vent!

First up is Army Chief of Staff General Peter Schoomaker who, at a speech last Friday, was asked about where the Army was in finding Osama bin Laden. The response of the highest ranking officer in the Army? "I don't know whether we'll find him," he said in a speech to the Rotary Club of Fort Worth. "I don't know that it's all that important, frankly."

Great. That's just fucking great. I don't want to hear one more word from ANY conservatives about how the Democrats are weak on terror. You want to gripe about something? Start with this guy. And after that why don't you move on to President Bush and Drunken Shooter, who were both quoted over the weekend as saying that the United States will never bomb KNOWN Al Qaeda bases in Pakistan because they are our allies.

Hey, George and Dickhead, why don't you fly over there, help them put on their jammies, and give them a good night kiss...making sure they are comfortable, of course! Osama bin Laden is responsible for the 9-11 attacks. He is our nation's biggest threat. He is Number One on the FBI's most wanted list and the Army thinks he doesn't matter anymore? And Shooter wants to rely on Pakistan to help "root out Al Qaeda?" Right. Like that is going to happen. And somehow this is all OK ? Something is very, very wrong here people. The words coming out of these people's mouths....something stinks to high heaven and I smells me a rat.

Helping matters immensely as always, is our own resident moron, Michele Bachmann (R-MN, 6th District) who has been going around saying that she knows of a "secret Iranian plan" to partition Iraq into three parts and create a terrorist safe haven. "Half of Iraq, the Western and Northern Portion of Iraq, is going to be called the Iraq State of Islam, something like that. And I'm sorry, I don't have the official name, but it's meant to be the training grounds for terrorists, " she was quoted as saying.

Um...what the fuck are you talking about Michele? First of all, Iran supports the US backed government because it is a Shiite led body. Second, the Northern part of Iraq is run by the Kurds, peacefully I might add, and have no love loss for Iran. In fact, they have been and are our strongest ally in the country. Third, most of the violence in Iraq is being carried out by Sunni extremists, who loathe Iran and have NOTHING WHATSOEVER TO DO WITH AL QAEDA (aka the people who actually attacked us on 9-11).

None of what she is saying makes any sense to me but in this day and age of conservatives making up a bunch of shit based on their paranoid delusions, lying about it, and then playing into people's ignorant fears to gain votes, maybe by this time next week, the Bachman View on Iran will be gospel (pun fully intended).

For those of you who live in the Sixth District of Minnesota, your representative has taken leave of her senses and needs to be removed from office immediately. Please demand a recall vote and find someone who a). knows what they are talking about and b). is not completely full of shit. For more on this nausea, click here.

Thank goodness, though that we have the media, who can always be relied upon to report only the most important issues of the day. CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News are all bastions of democratic discourse and continually further our own intellectual.....wait, sorry, I have to stop typing because now I am the one that is completely full of shit.

For the last week, all three of the major news networks have been wall to wall Anna Nicole Smith and Brittany fucking Spears. This is news? Arguments over the body of dead woman? A spoiled bitch shaving her head is the lead story? Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, our own Star and Tribune ran a story about how Anna Nicole Smith "really wanted to be friends with Brittany." Really? (Giggle....) That's just so way cool important!!!

I am sooooo happy (photo above fully conveys my message to all three networks) to see that we are right back where we were on September 10, 2001 when the most important news of the day were people being attacked by sharks. Do you want to know why Al Qaeda managed to attack us so easily? It's because of bullshit idiocy like all of the above.

Imagine being a family member of someone who died in the 9-11 attacks. You are now being told by your government that the person responsible for the attacks isn't that important. You have a member of Congress who was the emotional maturity of a thirteen year old girl and likes to make up stuff! Your media has completely and utterly failed you in being the public purveyor of important information.

How do you feel?

Friday, February 23, 2007

The Funnies

I think I have put just about every typical section of a newspaper up here over the years: news, sports, entertainment, and opinion (obviously). Saving the weather for another time, I thought I would share a comic that I saw the other day in the City Pages. If you can't read it, click on the picture and it take you to page where can view it in a larger size

It has been two days since I saw it and I am still laughing about it.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Oooo, tough guy!

There has been a lot of talk in the latest thread about how Democrats are "weak" and Republicans are "tough" so I thought I would share this video with all of you.

This was a press conference six months after 9-11. If Al Gore were president and said these things, neocons would've called for his head. Instead, since George Bush can do no wrong, he gets a free pass. Oh, and Mr. President, the host country that you talk about here...hmm...Taliban resurgence, Al Qaeda camps rebuilt...

You're doing a heckuva job, Brownie!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Bringin' Out The Sack

Two posts from me today. Kinda different, I know, but after hearing Australian Prime Minister John Howard (left) run his mouth recently, I had to put something up about it.

He was quoted as saying, "Terrorists are praying for a Democrat to win in 2008." Why? If you follow this line of logic, it is because Democrats are "weak" and the terrorists will be able to attack our country again. Once the Democrats are in power again, terrorists will be able to run rampant, killing people left and right in the Middle East and around the world.
I think Prime Minister Howard and whoever in the Bush administration is paying him off need to be reminded of a few facts.

1. The worst terrorist attack in our country's history occurred under a Republican president.

2. The last time I checked Al Qaeda has been rebuilding much of its operation in Afghanistan and terrorists are carrying out attacks on a daily basis in Iraq, Lebanon, Gaza, The West Bank, India, Pakistan, Indonesia (am I starting to bore all of you yet?....I could go on...)

3. All of the major candidates for the Democratic nomination have been on record as saying that troops need to be re-deployed to fight the people who actually attacked us on 9-11.

4. The Democrats, not the Republicans, were the ones who have been fighting tooth and nail to enact the recommendations of the 9-11 commission.

So, Johnny, congratulations. You are the recipient of this week's Shitsack!


Enjoy!

Whither the Good News?

WCCO has an interesting story on their web site today about where all the good news in Iraq is being reported or not reported. Check it out.



The most interesting thing I found was the percentages: 25 percent negative, 20 percent positive, 35 percent neutral, and 20 percent too diverse to categorize. So, all the lather that neocons have themselves worked up for is for a measley 25 percent? Maybe they should stop watching the "liberal" media channels so much and seek out alternative news sources.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Only A Matter Of Time

Take a look at these two videos below. The first one is Fox's sad attempt to air a "Daily Report" type show but skewed to conservativer humour. Originally, I had planned on my first column about Barack Obama being my last in a series on the 2008 Presidential hopefuls but I really couldn't wait to get this up. What absolutely slays me about this is the video that they show over the voice over "everywhere people are going crazy for Barack Obama." It's news footage from a rally in Africa, not the United States, and one in which Senator Obama was not even in attendance. The subtext here is staggering. Talk about pandering. Fox is basically saying, "Look at the nutty savages jumping around for Obama. They's crazy, massuh!"

The second video is a story on Rush Limbaugh calling Halle Barry and Barack Obama a "Halfrican American."

So much for conservatives being racially sensitive.

Video #1

Video #2

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Monday, February 12, 2007

De Plane! De Plane!

This may come as a shock to many of you but there are people in our country that believe we are living on Fantasy Island. You know....a magical place where there are no repercussions for anything we do. A place where there is no responsibility....especially if you are a conservative.

Take for example the issue of global warming. As I was driving to work the other day, I tuned in AM 1500 to listen to the morning musings of Bob Davis, their 9am-12n host. For the past couple of weeks, ol' Bob has got a bur up his ass about what he calls "The Global Warming Conspiracy." According to Bob, every scientist that says that Carbon Dioxide emissions are raising the temperature of the Earth is part of this conspiracy and they are willfully muzzling scientists who disagree with them in order to make money. It's money, not trying to save mankind, that is motivating these global warming maniacs. Former presidential candidate Al Gore is at the forefront of this conspiracy with his movie An Inconvenient Truth, which is now being shown in schools around the country as fact. Heresy! (according to Bob anyway).

Even our own President Bush has now been co-opted by these evil forces, daring to mention alternative fuels and environmental shepardism in his State of the Union address. In addition, Christian Conservatives have also lost the plot, so to speak, and have formed groups like the Evangelical Christian Initiative. Gads!

I used to have a lot of respect for Bob Davis. His old show came on right before Art Bell late at night and he always had many interesting things to say. I didn't always agree with him...he is a conservative after all....but I enjoyed his show. Listening to him spew his litany of half truths last week made me decide is was high time I wrote a column about global warming and what is really going on. To do that, I must first explain the definition of a scientific theory.

Contrary to what many neocons will have you believe, all science begins with an idea or "theory" which is then advanced towards validation based on research. Empirical evidence is gathered and theories become more sound or less sound based on the data gathered. Remember, though, that no matter how much evidence is gathered, theories remain theories and they always will. This is unlike conservatives who take their religious "belief" and stick to it come hell or high water. It's a lot easier to change an idea but a belief...well you might as well try to get Brad Childress (current head coach of the Minnesota Vikings) to admit that his offensive scheme blows ass. It is not going to happen.

Take for example, the theory of evolution. Yes, that's right, folks evolution is a theory. You didn't read it wrong. It just so happens that evolution is a theory that has a lot of evidence behind it and is more than likely accurate in explaining how we evolved. One of the common misconceptions about evolution is that it explains the origin of life. It does not. It simply explains how homo sapiens evolved over time. Unlike the faith based explanations of life, science allows for future discoveries to lead to alternate theories.

Global warming is a theory as well. Last week, major scientists of the world agreed, with 90 percent certainty, that global warming is happening as a result of carbon dioxide emissions from mankind. Does that mean that it is happening unequivocally beyond a doubt? No. But it is highly probable. And what I got from the reports is that we need to do something about it. For sake of brevity, I am not going to list the full report and evidence but you can click here for that.

The problem with the ever shrinking group of people that doesn't believe in global warming is that they don't really listen, they don't understand, and they let their own paranoia and sensationalism carry them away. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that the people that stand to lose the most money from global warming initiatives are the same people that got President Bush elected (aka the same people that own KSTP). These are the same people who are waging a systemic effort to "play down" the threat of global warming and as well as a disinformation campaign (of which ol' Bob is a part of) that rivals the current "War on Terror" drivel.

Several media outlets have reported that more than 120 scientists across 7 federal agencies have been pressured by members of Bush Co. to remove references to "climate change" and "global warming" in reports, press releases, and even intra-office memos. NASA (National Aeronautics and Space Administration) and NOAA (National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration) scientists have basically been living in fear for the last six years and have seen much of the work buried if it had anything to do with global warming. It is because of these stories that I don't believe President Bush when he says that he now believes in global warming.

So, all of you will have to excuse me when I get enraged to the point of insanity when I hear people like Bob Davis talk about scientists being muzzled who don't believe in global warming. IT'S THE OTHER WAY AROUND, FUCKO! I hear scientists all the time on Fox News, AM 1280, and AM 1500 talking about the myth of global warming. In fact, you had one on today! What the hell are you talking about, Bob?

I find it ironic that people like Bob Davis are eager to believe anything that has to do with "evil doers comin to gin us" and yet believe nothing about the very real dangers of global warming. It is in this irony that you can see the real agenda behind this tactic. The military industrial complex benefits from a frightened population all too willing to give up their freedoms to "fight terror" and is in danger from any referendum on global warming because the very building of these weapons is causing some of the problems with the environment.

So, Bob, there is a conspiracy and the ones that are after money (or in this case keeping their grubby hands on it) are the people YOU support....They are also know as THE PEOPLE THAT CAUSED THE PROBLEM IN THE FIRST PLACE. This is what I meant in my column entitled "Origin of the Species" from two weeks ago. The people that talk about global warming being a danger...what is their goal? From what I can see, it is taking better care of our planet. The people that think that global warming is a hoax...what is their goal? To keep things the way they are? To do nothing?

Which one is part of the solution and which one is part of the problem?

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Cured!

Hallelujah! Ted Haggard is cured!

For those of you who don't know, this video will catch you up on the saga of Ted Haggard, President of the National Assoication of Evangelicals. After the news came out about his meth amphatimine fueled gay sex escapades last fall, he declared that he would be entering a treatment program, much like AA, that would cure his gayness.

Initial estimates put his detoxifiction at 1-3 years but the Lord works in mysterious ways and Pastor Haggard has been cured in only three weeks! So, no more drugs, cocksucking, anal love, and large buckets of oil for Teddy. I guess he will just have to content himself with missionary position sex with his wife.

What a bore....

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

How Things Really Are

I thought I would throw up this video so we could see the "real conservative" response to President Bush's State of the Union address. What I find most interesting about his comments is how he views the Democrats--which dovetails into my topic from yesterday.

How can people like Tony Perkins think that the Democrats are "non family" when all of the bills they pushed through the House ultimately help the family AND had Republican support?

Monday, February 05, 2007

Get Out Your Scorecards

Buried deep within the back pages of most major newspapers and aired at the end of each news hour on all of the major news networks was a story that only the "liberal" media could air.

The Democrats actually did something.

That's right, folks. I know it's hard to believe but for once a group of politicians kept their promise:

The First 100 Hours.

Nancy Pelosi, the current Speaker of the House of the United States House of Representatives, promised the American people that if they Democrats were elected in November of 2006, shit would get done. It has gotten done. And they even got it all done in only 42.5 legislative hours. For those of you keeping score on this so called "do nothing" political party, here are the facts:

Jan 9, 2007: Anti-terrorism recommendations of the 9-11 Commission. The first piece of legislation out of the gate was security. Why this had not been passed by conservatives and does not have the support of President Bush (two groups of people that supposedly want our nation safer) is a mystery to me. The new bill changes the formula for allocation of federal funds for distribution to states and cities which is good because places like Kentucky, Alabama, and Mississippi (three very conservative states btw) were getting more money than places like New York, California, and New Jersey get more. Gee, I wonder why. This bill also beefs up intelligence on our border and scanning of cargo coming into the US. (Passed 299-128, GOP Support 68)

Jan 10, 2007: Raised the Minimum Wage...to $7.15 an hour. Oh well, I guess more people will be making more money aka The End of the World is nigh. Lock up your daughters! (315-116, GOP Support 82)

Jan 11, 2007: Passed Stem Cell Research which lifts President Bush's restrictions on using federal funds for human embryonic stem cell research and puts our country back onto a path of actual thinking and away from the "let's use leeches and think good thoughts" method of science we have employed for the last seven years. (253-174, GOP support 37)

Jan 12, 2007: Passed Medicare Drug Prices plan which requires the US government to negotiate directly with drug companies to obtain lower prescription prices for seniors. Yep, now my grandmother and grandfather, ages 89 and 90 respectively, won't have to skip pills anymore because Anderson T. Wilson, CEO of Butt Ram Pharmaceuticals, needs to have a third vacation home. (Passed 255-170, GOP Support 24)

January 17, 2007: Passed Student Loans bill which would but the interest rate in half. Again, less money for rich people. How sad. (Passed 356-71, GOP support 124)

January 18, 2007: Passed a new Energy Policy which will roll back 14 billion dollars of tax breaks and subsidies for US Oil companies. The money will go into a reserve which will fund alternative energy. Probably the saddest one of all...because my life's goal is to make sure that this fat fuck to the left (recently retired Chairman of ExxonMobil, Lee Rayomond ) gets to continue to stuff his face full of one hundred dollar pastries. (Passed 264-163, GOP Support 36)

In addition, I am happy to report that on several of these issues my congressmen, Jim Ramstead, voted with the Democrats. Apparently he, along with several other Republicans, are starting to wake up and smell the coffee. The American people want change and if they don't get it, elected officials in Congress are going to be shown the door.

The same can not be said for Michele Bachmann (last seen making lipstick imprints on her 8 x 10 glossy of President Bush) however, voted against every one of these bills. I am so shocked by this that it is hard for me to even type right now. Just out of curiosity, and I really want an answer here, is it possible that there is someone who is more of a mindless sycophant than Michele Bachmann.?

Anyway, the reality is that the Senate will take longer to pass these bills and President Bush will more than likely veto the stem cell bill and the energy bill for sure. Even so, I am extremely heartened by the number of Republicans that voted on each of these bills; 82 for the minimum wage and 124 for the student loans bill are huge steps in the right direction and it may just be that I will have one or two less things to bitch about on this blog. Sigh....

But the most satisfying gift of all that the Democrats have given us is the one that plucks a large tomato from the cart and throws it squarely in the eyes of the naysayers. The constant dirge of verbal epithets, email, and posts on this blogs which characterize the Democrats as a "do nothing but whine" party can now be viewed as having the intrinsic worth of a bucket of warm spit. Isn't it odd that it took the Democrats, the supposed representatives of the irresponsible and lazy citizens of our country, to insist upon an actual 40 hour work week for Congress?

Do tell.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

President Bush Goes on a Rampage

Well, not exactly a rampage but President Bush toured a Caterpillar plant in Peoria, Illinois two days ago and apparently got a little wacky. It seems our esteemed leader had some difficulty maneuvering the heavy machinery and almost took out some of those "liberal" media members.

Sgt. Perkins sent me this link

http://www.talk.newsweek.com/default.asp?item=464251

which details the story in further detail. The reason why I am posting it here is for all you to scroll down after the column and read the comments. They are hilarious. They are not unlike the comments on this blog and I found them to be quite refreshing, particularly the neocon remarks which further illustrate the bubble of unreality in which they currently reside. Enjoy!

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Finally, Some Answers

Some of you have wondered why I call people stupid. Some of you wonder why people around the world hate us so much. Some of you may also wonder one of the chief reasons why I decided to become a teacher.

This video is your answer.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Origin of The Species

The other night I closed my eyes and started to think about all of the challenges we face as a nation. The turmoil in the Middle East, changing climate, and health care. Education. Poverty. Inequality. Abortion. All of these things floated through my mind as I was heading off to dreamland. With the exception of the Middle East, very simple solutions entered my mind and I began to wonder why they can't be implemented. It's a simple question with simple answer.

Conservatives.

That's right, folks. This may come as a shock to you that I would feel this way but conservatives are the major road block to most of the solutions to the problems our country faces. In fact, in some cases they are the cause of the problem. How is this possible? Liberals stand up to make a difference on these issues and conservatives, much a like a jealous younger sibling, rip them down -creating a cynicism about a particular issue where there should be none. Conservatives do a good job of creating conflict when there should be consensus.

Let's take a look at abortion and gay marriage; the two center pieces of the conservative agenda. Abortion is a problem in this country. I think we can all agree that it would be great if there were none. Conservatives would be ecstatic if there were no more abortions. So would liberals as it would take away a very large bit of ammo that conservatives have against the left. Let's end abortions now!

Oh, but wait. Can't do it. Because conservatives want people to abstain from sex. Liberals want people to be educated about sex and use birth control. Of these two choices, which do you think has the greater likelihood of succeeding? Conservatives will not give an inch on this issue and the base of their party is living in a fantasy land that refuses to provide simple education to people to prevent this horrible thing from happening. I have talked about this before but it needs repeating. It is a simple fact that if more people used birth control, there would be less abortions.

Liberals would like GLBTs (Gay Lesbian Bi-Sexual Trans genders) to have the same rights that everyone has. They would also like non-whites and women to be treated better. Conservatives absolutely do not want GLBTs having the same rights as the rest of the population and, in some cases, would like to see gay people locked up or shot. Conservatives are also under the horribly mistaken impression that racism and sexism are all but vanquished in this country and, oddly, take credit for it.

So, here again, we see liberals trying to solve what is very obviously a problem and conservatives blocking that solution and, in the case of GLBTs, fomenting hate. The same paradigm applies to the rest of the issues mentioned above.

Environment: Conservatives in this country, for the most part, think that global warming is a fantasy. They think, and this just makes me want to hit my head against a brick wall, that liberals created global warming to make money. The lap dogs of right wing radio spew lies so vile about this that it is hard for me to fathom the unreality that is unspooled. Ultra conservative industry leaders will never give an inch on the horror that they are creating and the people they have bought off (the Michele Bachmanns of the world) brainwash us into believing that global warming is a myth and everything will work out just fine.

Health Care: Conservatives health care plan is....don't get sick. Oh, and keep your paws off of my money.

Education: The conservative plan for education is: Let's create an army of robots who take tests well but don't actually learn anything. Oh, and let's ignore the fact that people of other races/nationalities learn differently than white people because who cares about them anyway?

Poverty: Conservative plan to attack poverty: poor people are lazy and should work harder. They shouldn't even be making the 5 dollars an hour that I am paying them. 7 dollars an hour? Are kidding me?

So, now who is open minded again and how is intolerant? Why should I accept them for who they are when they are part of the continuance of the problem? And, finally, look at all of the issues listed above and the atypical conservative response: doesn't it all revolve around money and keeping people stupid?

As if all of this stuff wasn't enough to get you in a mouth watering rage, conservatives then have the audacity to accuse liberals of being the cause of and/or hindrance to all of these problems. They shift the blame to liberals accusing them of being irresponsible or too idealistic and, oddly, don't even claim 50 percent of the responsibility themselves.

Make no mistake about it. Most of these problems have simple solutions and if it were left up to liberals, most of them would be either by solved or on a path to solution. For the last seven years, we have left things up to conservatives and, in all of these areas, have moved backwards. Look at these issues and decide for yourself, logically, which side thinks more about people and which side thinks more about money?

The greatest lie that I have ever heard in this country is that liberals are destroying everything. You hear that mantra constantly on the radio, the TV, the blogsphere, and among the people in your life. It is the ultimate re-direction because if you sit back and truly look at the issues, the real culprit is revealed.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

OhmyGodIcan'tbelieve it

Did you hear? Oh my God, this is so awesome. I just heard this from Sierra after 3rd period gym and it is soooo totally cool.

Michelle got to kiss the president. And hug him and touch him for like....30 WHOLE SECONDS!!!

Check it out this cool video...
http://wcco.com/topstories/local_story_024193038.html

She is such a little hottie...gawd, I wish I were her. My daddy says she is the best. She does all the right things like when those people...like in our capital and stuff....those bad guys that now run things....when they tried to take my daddy's money away and give it to the spics and niggers, she voted against it. I don't see why they can't buy what they need for the 5 dollars an hour daddy pays them. Besides, how am I going to get my Mercedes for graduation and stuff?

Plus, daddy says that my home girl is going to make sure that all those people that shake around like a spaz and stuff just die off. How could anyone want to kill those cutie wutie babies so some retard can be normal. As if they would be normal anyway..

I still can't...y'know....believe it. She is so lucky...look at her...she is totally macking his shit and I don't get to...ah well, maybe someday....a girl can dream, right?

I gotta go...otherwise I'm gonna be late for Ms. Stuple's social studies class. Daddys says that her class em--emhance---em-somethings....I don't know but she loves terrorists and stuff.

Gotta go!

XXXOOO
Brettahny

Monday, January 22, 2007

A REAL Note From The Front

Last week, a regular reader of Notes From The Front emailed me the following:

Mark, I am always amazed at your very intelligent and worldly interpretations of the events and opinions. It is a great pleasure to find SO Much clear thinking in you and that you are brave enough to express it so freely.

Thank you,

Al-ilahat

Al-ilahat is from Iran and has been living here in Minnesota for the last 40 years or so. She travels back and forth to the Middle East quite frequently and, in the last three years, has been talking to "the person on the street" in various countries in the Middle East quite a bit lately. I consider her to have much more knowledge of the area then I do so I have decided to make her the first official correspondent for Notes From The Front and have given her the opportunity, this week, to post as a guest writer.

So, without further adieu, here is a true Note From the Front.

The Language of the Conversation Iraq

The language of the conversation about Iraq needs to change not the course. George Bush has wanted the people of the United States to believe that there is a danger to the United States and that Iraq represents every bit of danger that we face in the world. This is the lie and the total false cover for his personal need to remove Saddam from the picture. Saddam was the Bush family henchman just like Noriega and the Shah of Iran and perhaps even Musharraf if he is not careful. These people were recruited, trained and did all the dirty deeds in the name of “protecting our national interest”. It was a good cover for our arms sales, controlling OPEC, and eavesdropping on the good old Soviet Union.

If Saddam Hussein had been interrogated any more he would have had to admit to the fact that he waged War with Iran war on behalf the Bush family. We have all seen the pictures (left) of Rumsfeld visiting him in Iraq to provide him all the arms, aerial reconnaissance and tactics for that 9 year war. They bombed the oil fields in Southern Iran to retaliate for the Shah for wanting to raise oil prices and getting OPEC unified around him.

The language needs to change because the Muslim fanatics are angry with the United States for violating their sacred homeland with our troops. We betrayed them in Afghanistan when they fought the war on our behalf to remove the Soviets and clear the way for more oil pipelines in the region. The language has to change because the Bush family brought on the Islamic power in that region by supporting the Ayatollah Khomeini in to power to topple the Shah. We had seen this type of activity before in Central and South America. Islamicising really back fired and they are stuck. The anger we face from that region is not about jealousy for the "freedom" of the United States. It is about the US imposing what they perceive as being a inherently corrupt system on to them.

The people of the Middle East are hardworking and proud of their heritage and history. They have always lived with their rules and religious order. They are God fearing and mean it. The United States destroyed that social and moral web and abandoned them. Our modern methods were imposed on them without reason and without basis. The natural evolution of social and political self discovery has been disrupted by our greed and want of control. Much of this has been done in the hands of one Bush or the other. The arrogance and disdain for the humanity of that region had brought on all this hatred. Let’s change the language and call it what it is.


I want to end the killing of the people first, Americans, Iraqis, Iranians and others. Any course is better than this.

Al-ilahat

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Welcome To The Shitsack

WCCO has a semi regular piece they run called Reality Check. They look at a story, dissect the spin, and then tell you what the facts actually are. In concert with that idea, I am going to start a new feature at Notes From The Front. We are going to have a fairly regular themed column which I lovingly call....The Shitsack.

While the Grab Bag is more about the variety of things that either irritate me or excite me, the Shitsack will focus exclusively on conservative language, dissect what they are saying and then explain very directly why they are completely full of shit. From time to time, I may also call it The Complete Sack of Shit which, of course, conveys a similar meaning.

To illustrate how each Shitsack will work, I thought it would be fun to talk about the word "liberal." The word liberal, as defined by conservatives, is:

1. Weak, whiny, narrow minded, criminal, thief of my precious money, traitor, scumbag and/or rapist of children.

The actual definition of liberal, according to Webster's dictionary is:

1. favorable to progress or reform, as in political or religious affairs.

2. favorable to or in accord with concepts of maximum individual freedom possible, esp. as guaranteed by law and secured by governmental protection of civil liberties.

3.favoring or permitting freedom of action, esp. with respect to matters of personal belief or expression: a liberal policy toward dissident artists and writers.


4. of or pertaining to representational forms of government rather than aristocracies and monarchies.

5. free from prejudice or bigotry; tolerant: a liberal attitude toward foreigners.

6. open-minded or tolerant, esp. free of or not bound by traditional or conventional ideas, values, etc.

7. characterized by generosity and willingness to give in large amounts: a liberal donor.

8. .given freely or abundantly; generous: a liberal donation.

So, clearly we can see that conservatives have taken their large, grabastic paws and dug deeply into the Shitsack. I think we can all agree that, based on the actual definition of the word liberal, this is something to which we should all aspire. Interestingly, the word conservative, according to Webster's, is defined as:

1. resistant to change

2. cautiously moderate or purposefully low

3. unimaginatively conventional

Whee-hoo...sign me up for that!!!

Anyway, now that we have gotten the basic rules for the Shitsack out of the way, let's all put on our rubber glovies and look no further to our very own Notes From The Front for this week's Complete Sack of Shit from conservatives. In a recent post in comments, a conservative told the story of a report on ABC by John Stossel who made the claim that people of faith or conservatives give more to the poor than non religious or liberal people. This story was mentioned to me at the gym by several conservative friends of mine and I noticed articles about it popping up in the papers.

I knew at the time that the Shitsack had been dug into very deeply but I really didn't have all the facts to back up my responses. Now I do.

To begin with, if you are going in actual dollar amounts, atheists win hands down and people of faith don't have a fucking prayer:) Why? Because the biggest donors to charity in our country are Bill Gates and Warren Buffet, who have donated billions of dollars to charity. Both of them are self-proclaimed atheists. Buffet even donated 90 percent of his fortune to Bill Gates's foundation. But, y'know, let's be fair to religious people because they can't really be expected to keep up with the likes of Buffet and Gates....monetarily speaking.
So, what are some other reasons this claim belongs in the Shitsack?

Michelle Bachmann, left, our esteemed congresswoman from the Sixth District here in Minnesota, voted against increasing the minimum wage. Huh? She is very religious person who espouses hard work to get ahead. So the people who are working hardest in this country should make less money? According to her, the minimum wage hike will hurt businesses....well, maybe the conservative ones that give all their money to charity as opposed to the liberal ones that pay more to their employees and thus have none left over for charity, right?

Bachmann's "generosity" is typical of conservatives who seem to give all the breaks to rich corporations and yet none to social programs. Claiming that this money will trickle down to employees, conservatives consistently cut taxes for the rich. The fact is that in 1985 CEO's compensation was, on average, 20 times that of one of it's workers. In 2005, CEO's make 400 times as much as their average worker.

Wow. That's a heckuva trickle. Must be that new "non wet" water....y'know the kind that is invisible.

In addition, Blue states give more to the federal government in taxes....red states give less. Yet, most of the this money goes to the red states. For example, between 1991 and 2001 California paid $253.5 billion in federal taxes over the amount it received from the federal government. These subsidies went to red states like Alabama, Mississippi and Louisiana, who received $100.1 billion, $86.93 billion and $84.3 billion, respectively, above what they paid to the federal government. So, liberals in California are funding conservatives in the South now? Hey, waitaminute....suddenly I have decided that I want to be a conservative!!! No more taxes!!!

Now, I consider myself to be a person of faith so I am not ripping Christians here....just the ridiculous claim that people of faith and/or conservatives "give more" to the poor. It is flat out wrong. It's another example of conservatives trying to spin a great lie into a truth. When you hear comments like this from conservatives, just pull out the Shitsack.
And throw it at them.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

God Help Us All....

Before we get to the insanity that was the president's address to the nation last night, I want to respond to those conservatives, who I know read this blog but don't post, who have harangued me for "hating" Bush and stopping at nothing to destroy him. I do not hate President Bush... personally. Chances are, he and I, both sharing a love for the St Louis Cardinals, would get along famously at a ball game. It's not him personally that I detest. I loathe his actions.

When he starts to behave in a thoughtful, intelligent manner befitting the leader of the free world, then yes....I will have some kind things to say about him. This ridiculous idea that all liberals are "out to get Bush" is a not-so-clever ploy to re-direct us from the utter incompetence with which our country is being run. When I hear people tell me, well you just "hate Bush" so of course you aren't going to support him my response is...

No.

It's his actions. And if you can't see that what he is doing is horribly wrong, then how can I help you? Because you see, dear readers, that we have gone far past the point of "opinions" and we are now into fact. Or reality.

More and more I am beginning to believe that at least 20 percent of this country have completely lost their minds. I spend a fair amount of time to try to understand their mindset but the things that come out of the mouths....as was displayed on a recent broadcast of the Rush Limbaugh show.....are just plain wrong. "We have to give President Bush a chance," they say or "People are just out to destroy him." Give him a chance? What the fuck have the last four years been about?

Other comments heard were "We are fighting for our freedom" or "The terrorist want us to leave." I just...I am at a loss as to what to say anymore if people think this is true...I have gone from anger and frustration to a profound sense of sadness at what little thought these people have put into something so important....so vital.

Clearly, there was no thought in President Bush's speech last night. More or less, it was the same rhetoric with little movement in his position. His military commanders on the ground, most of Congress, and at least 80 percent of the American Public are against adding additional troops. Both the incoming and outgoing generals in charge of the operation say it's a bad idea.

Would someone please explain to me his thought process? I admit to being a dick a lot of the time on this blog but I really want to try to understand how a troop increase benefits us? More importantly, the supposed "mainstream" which neocons tout as being in touch with are overwhelmingly against this action. Many Republicans have said that all troop increase will do is offer more targets to the insurgency.

The only explanation that I can come up with is that President Bush and the people who are supporting him in this can't admit when they are wrong. George Bush was the wet dream of conservatives who were so angered by eight years of Bill Clinton that they didn't even bother to look into the man's history of failure. When George Bush failed in the oil business, people lost money. When he failed as the owner of baseball team, people lost money. When he failed as Governor of Texas, people in that state lost their standard of living.

His failures as president have cost people their lives. I believe that his past failures are what are driving him now. He will not back down. He will not admit he was wrong. He will keep going to try prove to all of us that he is "better than his daddy" (who oddly was not all that "good.") More people are going to die as a result of his wholly inappropriate hubris. He needs to stop what he is doing and I don't know if we can stop him.

It's that same hubris with the conservatives that are still in support of this president. They will never admit they are wrong and it will always be the fault of the liberals. Having only the conviction of your own vanity is how these people roll and, make no mistake about it, it is their myopic hatred of "liberals" like Bill Clinton and others that have put us into this position.

So, neocons, the next time you open your mouth to spout off about liberal hate and other overly simplistic delusions, why don't you take a look in the fucking mirror? And while you are it, maybe you can show President Bush the way to the rest room as well.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

A Fond Farwell

Before we get to my picks, let's break out the hankerchiefs and bid a hearfelt farewell to those that we lost in 2006

Saturday, January 06, 2007

BOOK LINK

CLICK HERE FOR NEW GOING DOWN ON LOVE BOOK LINK

BEST OF 2006

2006 was a wondrous year for music, television and film. Some really cool stuff came out this year and, in thinking about my annual tradition, it was hard for me to pick my favorites. So many artists and filmmakers stand out as doing exceptionally interesting work in 2006.

I have to say that it (finally!) feels like we are on our way out of the somewhat recent trend of boring music, dull television, and the same old movies. Thank God!

Now onto the picks...

BEST CD

I think this is the first year that the Best CD of the year came out two weeks after the year started. I have talked about it all year and even got to see them play live in Chicago right after my birthday. There has not been a CD that came out since January 16th that has equalled Arctic Monkey's Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I Am Not. In fact, the only release that come close is Leave Before The Lights Come On.......the latest single by Arctic Monkeys which does not appear on the CD.

What a delight this music is for fans who like everything from The Beatles to Oasis and in between. It's just a great collection of tunes for anyone, really, but the songs really tell the story of what it is like to be young, in love, and hitting the pubs and clubs. Arctic Monkeys tore through 2006 like the Pistols did in 1976 and I am anxiously awaiting their follow up album due sometime in late 2007 or early 2008.

The other impressive thing about this band is they did it all without any major label support and buzz created from My Space. Hey, all you major label A and R dorks who work for the man...your days are numbered...it's a whole new world out there!!

BEST TV SHOW

This one was tough. Battlestar Galactica got better, 24 got way better, The Sopranos returned after a long hiatus with some great shows, and Lost is just plain insane right now. So, needless to say, the choice was tough.

But a little show came along that made me excited about Monday nights again. I used to love to watch football on Mondays but have become very bored with the NFL of late. The parity in the league makes for some very dull games. In addition, I have also yearned for genre or sci fi fantasy TV to dominate the airwaves again. NBC has delivered in spades.



Heroes is the Best Show on TV. Saving the cheerleader and saving the world only scratched the surface of this incredibly exciting, multi layered character driven story. There are mysteries just like the ones on Lost but there are more answers. And people talk more like ordinary people talk. It drives me nuts on Lost because people don't spend their entire days talking in riddle language.

That does not happen on Heroes. It's all about action, mystery, intrigue, and yes, Super Heroes!! Yeah, that's right...I am letting my inner geek gush out all over the place. Heroes also has what is probably the most interesting character to come to TV in the last 20 years...coincidentally named Hiro! The Japanese Actor Masi Oka is a marvel to watch and deserves many kudos.

Combined with the undeniably fun Dr. Who and Life On Mars from the BBC, here's hope that the realm of the mysterious continues for a long time.

BEST FILM

Another tough one because there were so many good films. The U.S. vs. John Lennon was noteworthy not only because it had my favorite subject :) but because of its insight into our current administration's lust to gain access to every aspect of our lives. In fact, this film had the cinematic line of the year which was uttered by Gore Vidal:

"Mr Lennon represented life and Mr. Nixon and Mr. Bush represent death."

Of course, there were the fun movies as well. James Bond returned (as he always does) with Casino Royale. It was the best Bond entry since The Living Daylights and Daniel Craig kicked serious ass as the new Bond. Jet Li's Fearless was a veritable ton of chop sockey fun. Kevin Smith's Clerks II was so funny that I needed to stop by the Hennepin County Medical Center for oxygen.

But the best film of the year was not a comedy or an action movie. Nor was it a chick flick or a "gee, I have never gotten over being 15 years old" stupid ass horror film. The best film of the year was a poignant reminder of what we have lost.

Emilio Estevez's Bobby is the best film of 2006 because it shows us the last time we had a leader (or almost had a leader) that wanted to change things for the better. The central message of the film is that Bobby Kennedy was the "last one" in a serious of extraordinary men (JFK, Dr. King) who would've made our country better. They were all killed by men who were seriously threatened by these plans to achieve parity in our country and this film shows us, through the eyes of fictional characters, how RFK represented that final, last hope.

The film's closing sequence, using audio from actual interviews with Bobby Kennedy, is gut wrenching and I found myself weeping at what we, as a nation, lost that day. It was particularly awful considering where we are today and I found myself wondering what Mr. Kennedy would think of our country's current state and direction. If any of you know anything about Robert Kennedy, then you already know what the answer would be.
So, those are my picks for 2006. What are yours? Leave Comments below....

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

The Definition of a Winner

Alright, so I know that I said I was going to post my Best of 2006 this week. I will...it's just going to be a bit later in the week. I know you are all waiting with bated breath to see what my picks are for the Best CD, Best TV Show and Best Film of 2006 but you are just going to have to wait.

Because last night I witnessed the greatest football game I have ever seen.

Before we take a look at the clip highlighting why the game was the greatest, I would like all of the fucking losers here in Minnesota (Gopher hockey excluded of course) who think they can run a sports program to take note of Chris Peterson. Yes, that's right Major Childress and Idiot Maturi...Chris Peterson, first year head coach of the Boise State Broncos knows how to win.

Y'see folks, I am real sick and tired of the likes of Brad Childress, head coach of the Minnesota Vikings , and the dumbest fucking athletic director in the NCAA, Joe Maturi of the U of M with their "let's play not to lose" conservative bullshit. More than anything, I would like 5 minutes with each of them. There is no doubt in my mind that I could turn the Minnesota Vikings, Gopher Football, and Gopher Basketball progams into WINNING endeavors.

My 5 minutes with the little Major would go something like this. I would explain to him that, sitting in my chair at home or at the Spring Street Bar, where I watch Vikings games, I can tell which of the six offensive plays, from his grand playbook, he is going to run. If I can tell what he is going to do, then imagine what someone who watches sixty hours of film a week can see. I bet Bill Bellichik wrapped his film day after about one hour of viewing. In addition, having a tough run defense is great. Giving up an eight yard passing cushion over the middle of the field on every single play is not great.

I may not even need 5 minutes with dumbfuck. I would simply say to him that a B- average is not failing and if he wants to recruit decent athletes to come to the U, he should hold them to a standard of...say a 70 percent or better which I think is fair. But I don't think the man can tell where he is half of the time so it might be pointless. He certainly doesn't have any clue how to win.

What would be pointful (if there is such a word) is for the little Major, asshead, and the rest of us here in Minnesota pining for a real winner to watch this clip and see what having some fucking sack can bring you. Someone on YouTube put together a great highlight reel of the end of last night's Fiesta Bowl between the Oklahoma Sooners and the Boise State Broncos.

For some reason, I can't import YouTube today, so follow this link....and enjoy....I anxiously await your comments as I have several!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENwDDB0dlRk