This Is Getting Ridiculous

Last week a woman breathlessly reported that Joe Biden kissed her inappropriately -- on the back of the head in a completely asexual fashion, in front of hundreds of people. It was demeaning, she said. The other day another woman said that Joe Biden grabbed her head and rubbed noses.

This is getting extremely silly. What's next? "When Joe Biden shook my hand he clasped his other hand over mine and I felt oppressed, claustrophobic and unable to escape." Or "Joe Biden yelled in my ear at a campaign rally when everyone was clapping and screaming. And he sprayed spittle on my ear!" Or "Joe Biden leaned in to talk to me and he breathed on me and I could smell that he ate sausage and eggs for breakfast! And I'm a vegan!"

I'm from Minnesota, where physical displays of affection are less common than other places. I used to have a boss from Maryland. He would touch us to express support, putting his hands on our shoulders (no, he wasn't gay...). I didn't really like it, but I tolerated it. He clearly meant nothing by it, that was just the culture he came from.

If it were up to me, shaking hands wouldn't be a thing. It's a pointless invasion of personal space, a vector for disease, an anachronism supposedly hearkening back to ancient Greece to show that you weren't carrying a weapon.

The Japanese practice of bowing is much more respectful and hygienic, and allows for more subtlety and nuance than a handshake.

Then there are the jerks who use the handshake as a form of aggression and intimidation (like that dickhead Trump). I, like a lot of people, have arthritis, and shaking hands with a guy who likes to squeeze hard doesn't intimidate or threaten me -- it just proves the guy is stupid, inconsiderate lout who cannot be trusted.

The argument that "it's different for women" just doesn't cut it. Biden has done exactly the same sorts of things with men, as Jonathan Capehart of the Washington Post noted. And other women, including Stephanie Carter, wife of former secretary of defense Ash Carter, have expressed appreciation for Biden's physical expressions of support.

So far, none of the things Biden has done disqualify him in any way for being president. Democrats lodging these complaints are only helping the Republicans. Not because they are tearing down Joe Biden.

But because they further the Republican narrative that Democrats are completely bound up in PC culture, that Democrats are delicate little flowers triggered by the slightest perceived offense, that they are intolerant and can't respect the fact that other people and cultures have different standards of physical intimacy, that they accuse people falsely and imagine slights where none are intended.

This, in the Republican narrative, makes Democrats weak and incapable of running a country in a world filled with rough and tumble people.

I don't think Joe Biden should run for president. He's too old. And, to state the obvious, this behavior is indicative of his age, showing that he's from a different era with different standards of behavior, when physical contact implied trust, camaraderie and affection.

But these allegations of impropriety for innocent acts of support are preposterous and deleterious to all Democrats. Worse, these spurious allegations diminish the credibility of victims of real sexual harassment.

Knock it off, you idiots.