Forfeit These Services!

Samuel Warde has a nice variation on the anti-socialist pledge up over at Liberals Unite. Here are a few of my favorites...

Want to visit another country? Don’t bother unless you know a way around the border stop which is patrolled by the government and don’t forget you no longer can get a passport any more.

You need to worry about clean air or water once the commie EPA is shut down.

You no longer have to be bothered with paved roads, highways, interstate freeways or public bridges.

It's almost as if they don't understand how the real world works from the comfort of the basement of their parents home.

Super Socialist Sunday

As millions settle in to watch the big game today between the Green Bay Packers and the Pittsburgh Steelers, half of them (who are likely conservatives) need to read Bill Maher's New Rule on the NFL. 

Hilarious! And more true than he realizes. The NFL is indeed socialism in action. Smaller market teams like Green Bay and Pittsburgh share revenue with the bigger market teams like the New York Giants and the high profile teams like the Dallas Cowboys. All the money goes into one pot and it is shared. Shared! What a concept...

Success is punished as the winner of today's game will be picked last in the draft. In addition, today's game is a double dose of socialism as the city of Green Bay (aka the GOVERNMENT) owns the the Packers. So if they Pack do go on to win, all the people in Green Bay will benefit and not just one tyrannical owner.

Sit back for a moment and think about the BILLIONS of dollars the NFL makes every year. To call them a success would be as much of an understatement as saying the Beatles were a pop group in the 1960s. The reason why they are successful is due to their framework which is completely socialistic. I know this will be tough concept for the conservative brain to grasp (as they are wired differently) so I'm going to skip over the part where I ask some of you to reflect. Instead, I will point the light of interrogation on myself.

Looking inward, I do not like what I see. I actually prefer baseball to football. As Maher astutely points out, baseball is the libertarian's dream...every man for himself...smaller market teams crushed by giants like the Yankees...hands off my cash...fuck sharing....and, until very recently, indentured servants. Ideologically, I am more in line with football yet I prefer baseball. WTF??!!???

Perhaps I need to re-think all of this. As I often lament, I will not stand for such hypocrisy!

Friday Funnies

I don't think there is a limit to how many times I can state how much I love The Onion. Two recent stories there had me ROTFLMFAO. Target #1: The media and whiny liberals.

Democrats Could Lose Up To 8,000 Seats In Upcoming Midterm Election

With Democratic disapproval ratings in the quadruple digits, it's a foregone conclusion that Republicans will not only retake Congress, but hold it for the next 20,000 to 25,000 years. Experts also predicted the one-sided election results would cause Barack Obama to die on the spot, at which point the nation's leading conservative talk-radio host would be sworn in as president of the United States forever

Perhaps Democrats need to take a fucking chill pill, hmm?

The subject of race has come up recently in comments....

Tea Party Plans To Recruit More Coloreds This Fall

"We're bringing new voices and perspectives into the movement every day, and the addition of some more coloreds is only the beginning," Tea Party spokesman Michael Kealey told reporters, adding that he was "excited to welcome Negroes into the fold."

Please direct your competing victimization to the editorial board of The Onion.

Finally (the best for last, of course), the subject of "coercive government force to extract money from people" (aka Obama's taking Whitey's Money) has come up in comments again. For those of you who feel this way (special dedication to Flat Earther), will you you take this pledge?

I, __________ __________ __________ __, do solemnly swear to uphold the
principles of a socialism-free society and heretofore pledge my word
that I shall strictly adhere to the following: I pledge to eliminate
all government intervention in my life. I will abstain from the use of
and participation in any socialist goods and services including but
not limited to the following:

Police, Fire, and Emergency Services
US Postal Service
Roads and Highways
Air Travel (regulated by the socialist FAA)
The US Railway System
Rest Areas on Highways
Bridges
Sidewalks
Public Water/Sewer Services (goodbye socialist toilet, shower,
dishwasher, kitchen sink, outdoor hose!)
FDA Approved Food and Drugs
Publicly Funded Anti-Drug Use Education for Children
Treatment at Any Hospital/Clinic That Ever Received Funding From
Local/State/Federal Government
Medical Services and Medications That Were Created/Derived From Any
Government Grant/Research Funding
Socialist Byproducts of Government Investment Such as Duct Tape and
Velcro (NASA Inventions)
Use of the Internets, email, as the DoD's ARPANET was the basis for
computer networking
Foodstuffs /Meats/Pro duce/Crops That Were Grown With/Fed With/Raised
With/That Contain Inputs From Crops Grown With Government Subsidies
Public Education
Government grants/loans for higher education
Attending publicly funded or state colleges/universities

SWORN ON A BIBLE AND SIGNED THIS DAY OF ____IN THE YEAR ____.

_________________ _________________
Name/Town/State

Disconnect your computer from the internets,
sign and hand deliver to the appropriate agencies.

For the record, I will not be taking this pledge. I fully support all of these services which apparently means that I am supporting fascism.

Seig Heil!