Time for another grab bag. There was such a great response to the last one that I thought I would do another.
Things that are irritating Mark this week.....
*Fox News....this poor excuse for an "unbiased" news station is an embarrassment. A couple of weeks ago my wife and I were watching Hurricane Katrina coverage. We were mainly watching CNN. I flipped over to MSNBC and they had hurricane coverage on as well. Then I turned to Fox News where they were covering the MOST important story of the day: a black man who robbed a convenient store in Ohio. He was still loose and people were scared. Hurry, everyone, lock up the white women. They's a black man loose! I bet an activist judge let him out of prison....
*People who have ridiculous spellings for their names that should otherwise be normal. Example: people named "Amy" who spell their name "Ammee" or people named "Katie" who spell their name "Catee." God, this irritates the shit out of me! Look, I realize it's hard to be looked upon as unique in today's society and maybe having a cool spelling of your name might make you think you are being an individual but couldn't you find a better way? Like, maybe, letting your personality make people remember you? Hey, it works for me!
*Guys who were dress shirts, dress shoes and THE MOST DISGUSTING PAIR OF JEANS IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD!! You know these idiots. They all look the same with their dork gel haircuts and really bad aftershave. What the fuck is the matter with you, dude? Are you going to a rodeo? Put on some slacks, for crying out loud, and stop looking like a douchebag.
*Fantasty Football. The other day I was watching a Vikings game at a bar. I saw someone there with a laptop. What the fuck? Can't people just go out with friends, have a beer and watch the game anymore?
*People who drive in the left lane very slowly. The left lane is FOR PASSING ONLY, FUCKERS! If you aren't going fast, then move the fuck over. I can't tell you how many times I have gotten dirty looks from people in the left fucking lane when I pass them. Or the times when there is a phalanx of cars in the left and right lanes. I have asked people about this and, while some express their frustration as well, others say, "Well, we all like to ride together here in Minnesota." I am not a violent man but this statement makes me want to go all Chow Yun Fat with two guns on motherfuckers that think this way.
*And while we are on the subject of transportation...the road construction projects in the West Metro have really gotten out of hand. I expect a normal level of suckage every year but when you literally can't go North (494 and Hopkins Crossroads closed) or East (494 and 62 closed), then why even leave your house?
What is irritating you this week? Thanks as always folks!
Love,
Mahrc
7 comments:
Guys who were[sic] dress shirts, dress shoes and THE MOST DISGUSTING PAIR OF JEANS IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD!!
You're ripping on half the townies in Morris. If I still lived there, I'd be offended!
People who have ridiculous spellings for their names
Couldn't agree more. I was willing to let it slide until punctuation started appearing. When I saw D'ntay, that was the final straw.
Fantasty Football
I think you're being a little harsh here. Maybe you're just jealous because football is more exciting than the snoozefests that you watch. America's pastime my ass. Condemning fantasy football because of some nerd who brings his laptop to the bar is a bit like condemning volleyball because TV-boy is a prick. HMHC's earlier point about the guy quitting softball to "focus on fantasy football" has no relevance in normal society because, let's face it, that guy is already a lost soul. He plays softball, after all.
FF is, plain and simple, a great excuse for me to not have to pay attention to my wife on Sundays and Mondays. (just kidding honey!) Mow the yard? Sure thing honey. After this inning is over....
M'arkk
1. Are you surprised by Fox News? Are you just figuring this out now? C'mon. At least there's a "news" channel as far to the right as CNN is to the left. Their motto "Fair and balanced as long as you compare us to CNN" is as accurate as can be.
2. Parents who f--k up their kids names should be forced to live their lives spelling their first names to every acquaintance. Giving your kid a "creatively" spelled first name is as bad as giving your kid a common first name when already stuck with a common surname - say someone whose surname is "Campbell" naming their son ... oh, I don't know, "David".
"Hi, I'm Dave Campbell."
"No sh-t - me too!"
3. What bugs me is guys who comment on how other guys dress. Check out the women, M'arrk.
4. I hate FF. Most creative form of gambling there is, but it ruins so many aspects of the game. Trying to predict who will score the touchdowns is ridiculous.
5. Driving slowly in the left lane? Are you kidding me? You don't have anything better than that?
6. Why would a city, county, state, and the federal government try to coordinate a road construction project? Ahead of time? You must have considerable faith in government. Good for you. Say hi to the Easter Bunny for me.
Fyll
With this, my first post, I am graduating from the ranks of which I write to denounce. If you're reading a blog, you probably have your own opinions. Share them. Don't just read other people's bullshit without adding your own.
I also hate Vikings fans that think they have saved their season by beating the Packers. Please.
Crabmaster, are you going to see Clinton in two weeks?
What really pisses me off is people who complain about other people who drive in the left lane. It is my RIGHT to drive in the left lane whenever I want to. I drive the speed limit and if you don't like it...too bad. It doesn't say anywhere in the Constitution or the Declaration of Independence that I can't drive in the left lane obeying the posted speed limit. If I back traffic up a mile, so what? What are you going to do about it? Shake your fist at me? Give me the finger? Wave a gun at me? I'm obeying the law and I PAY taxes for the privlige to do whatever I want as long as it is within the limits of the law. You want to drive faster? You want to pass me by so you can get to your destination within YOUR self defined time limits? TOO BAD. Your "rights" to break the speed limit (and therefore the law) end where they violate my rights to do whatever I feel like doing in the left lane(within the limits of the law). I don't owe you anything let alone common courtesy.
Laws are set up to protect us and it is proven that lower speed limits save on gas and lives. I think we need to erase any vestiges of "I Can't Drive 55" and bring safety back to the people of this great nation (under God). In fact, I think this ought to be taken as serious contribution to the next presidential candidate's platform.
Except that in Wisconsen and Minnesota it is now LAW that the left lane is for passing only and I believe the fine is 50 bucks.
So it is not your right to stay in the left lane...only pass....
MsNBC Headline; " Milestone reached - 2000th dead in Iraq." Nothing more said about the populous elected constitution, at least since the headline of possible voter fraud.
I don't mind the stupid names as much as I used to. It helps me to identify the morons amungst us. The whole apple and tree thing . . . LaDipshit, or how 'bout Na'il ? Stupid spellings? - again, more proof of natural selection. They can continue to breed amongst themselves - we will always need workers for the service industry.
Guys and clothes? I'm a jeans and dress-shirt guy ! Bring it on metro-sexual !
Love "left lane defender", guy. Hang it right out there! You know, it's perfectly ok to feel that way, but, can you kindly feel that way in the right lane as well? Because given that you have a choice, and you choose to be a pain and use the left lane, then, I have the "right" to call you and asshole. Whether or not that bothers you is beside the point.
How's about fat chicks and ankle tattoos. I'm sorry; Is that sexy? I mean, aren't tattoos suppose to be an expression of some kind? - where it is, and what it is? Kind of a base sexuality thing? I don't know. Invariably they are pushing a stroller so, it must be working, I guess. Maybe just a night of hoggin' gone horribly wrong . . .
Chuck Woodsy
Ghost Rider, you didn't address me the correct way, but I'll let it slide. Clinton who? Bill or Hillary? Is he/she coming to the twin cities? I'll be in Europe in a couple weeks so I'm going to have to miss the visit. If I ever did end up meeting a Clinton I would be courteous and respectful, unlike the libtards who enjoy throwing eggs and pies at people.
1. Political statements by rock stars and movie stars. I find it amazing that some people are more apt to listen to a movie star's or rock singer's view on how we should prosecute world affairs than to someone whose profession it is to know how these things should go. Markadelphia plays the guitar, but Bruce Springsteen doesn't listen to him play. Why should we be subjected to Bruces views on the validity of the war? Shut up and sing. While I’m on the subject, someone please remind me what it is that makes Sean Penn an expert on anything. It seems that artists, including actors, musicians and writers, all work through a creative process. As a part of this process they often want to "push the envelope" in their respective medium, no artist wants to be perceived as stagnant. They want to be seen as "progressive" and ahead of the rest of society, who they often see as beneath them. In their zeal to be "progressive", most of these artists assume that anything rooted in tradition is inherently bad, and is part of the old way of doing things, which is why they so often despise conservatives. This is what helps foster a condescending elitist arrogance in some of them. The problem is many of these people like Tim Robbins, Martin Sheen or Fat Mike of NOFX want to be seen as "anti-establishment" and "progressive" so badly that they fail to use reason or facts in determining their political perspectives. In addition, many outspoken artists, especially actors, live in their multi-million dollar mansions and are insulated from normal society. It is as if they are in a cultural cocoon where they no longer interact with the average American. They are surrounded by publicists and legions of fans who kiss their ass on a daily basis. Just look at the lyrics of the song “Crumbs for your table” from U2’s “How to dismantle and atomic bomb”….. “Would you deny for others what you demand for yourself?” When asked further about these lyrics, Bono could not be reached for comment as he was stepping off his private jet and into his limousine. I have to go with Alice Cooper on this one…. “If you’re listening to a rock star in order to get your information on who to vote for, you’re a bigger moron than they are. Why are we rock stars? Because we’re morons. We sleep all day, we play music at night and very rarely do we sit around reading the Washington Journal.” -Alice Cooper
"Rock should never be in bed with politics...When I was a kid and my parents started talking about politics, I’d run to my room and put on the Rolling Stones as loud as I could. So when I see all these rock stars up there talking politics, it makes me sick." -Alice Cooper
2. People really need to quit saying “git-r done” so much. Just thinking about landing a left hook to the next person who says that in my immediate vicinity is giving me a boner as I type this.
3. Tabloid magazines and tabloid TV. Who cares if Nick and Jessica get divorced? If you actually care if Fergie gains 20 lbs then you have no life. It wasn’t the paparazzi that killed Di, it was each and every one of you no-life having dingbats who actually buy the National Enquirer. You feed the machine. Way to go, you killed Di. See, I know all the happenings of these people (and you all do too – admit it) even though most of us probably avoid celebrity gossip like we avoid prison sex.
4. Ever see that show on MTV called “My super sweet 16”? I can’t wait for those spoiled brat kids to get out in the real world simply because they have had the misfortune of growing up wealthy and therefore will have absolutely no concept of a reality where financial issues cannot be resolved by calling mommy and daddy. Nothing more annoying than an overblown sense of entitlement.
5. What about guys who are one-uppers? You all know them - you tell a story and they have a story that is better than yours. Example - A few years ago I was showing my friend Doug some pictures of the fish we caught in Minnesota, one of the pictures showed me holding a 4 lb bass I caught. I immediately got the story about how Doug once caught a 5 pounder.
6. People who take pro-wrestling too seriously. I’m just a fan and I like to see the characters. Got to pwtorch.com and read the “raw reax” and see the writings of people who actually care about how pro wrestling storylines go. Hey jerky, these are grown men in tights and every single one of their conflicts all seem to start and end just in time for the next commercial break...quit taking it so seriously.
7. Sportswriters. Many are either jealous ex-jocks who didn’t quite make it to the level of the people they are criticizing or fat slobs who never accomplished jack squat. Nothing is easier than demanding more from someone else. Most of them are so condescending it’s pathetic. Idiots.
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