Bill Maher on Glenn Beck

This is the whole New Rules segment from last Friday. Forward to 1:50 and check it out. It sums up the right's hyper over exaggeration to a tee!

Armed and Hilarious

Hailing from my home state of Minnesota, Republican Michelle Bachmann has been making quite a scene these days. I think we all remember her very special interview with Chris Matthews in which she called our current president "un-American." To be completely fair, though, Matthews (just like Katie Couric did with Sarah Palin) is a fascist liberal faggot who had the audacity to (gasp!)...ask her questions. So it really wasn't her fault and that's why she has never apologized for it.

Remember...conservatives...never wrong...always right!

It should come as no surprise to anyone that she is now advocating an armed insurgency, proving me right yet again that conservatives seem to view all things through the lens of violence. Speaking out against cap and trade a couple of weeks back, Bachmann said she wants Minnesotans "armed and dangerous on this issue of the energy tax because we need to fight back."

Hmm...now let me see if I have this straight. Conservatives spent months talking about William Ayers, Weather Underground, and their ties with the supposed "radicalness" of Barack Obama and yet who are the ones that continue advocating insurgency?

Meanwhile, Sarah Palin, talking a break from creating a list of books to be banned in her quickly fading fairy tale of being the queen, is-OMG-like sooo pissed off and stuff because of what Levi dished on Tyra so she went to her BFFs at People Magazine and set the record straight.

Is it just me or does the conservative movement get more entertaining every day?

Obama French Town Hall Meeting 4/3/2009 Pt5

This was the question I was talking about yesterday. Pay attention to the final point...fucking money.

Clear and to the Point

President Obama gave a town hall meeting today in Strasborg, France today. During the course of the Q and A , he took a question regarding terrorism. In his answer , he gave the most concise and compelling argument against torture (and...huh...without a teleprompter thus blowing the latest in a series of lame and borderline bizarre criticisms of our president).

He said

Our security and our values are not in contradiction.

This sums up exactly how I feel about the use of torture in our conflict against extremism. It doesn't work. We can maintain the values that we have as a nation when it comes to the dignity of human life and still protect our country. My grandfather proved it in World War II when, rather than treating human beings as animals as the Japanese did, we offered them food and clothing in exchange for information (that the readily gave up) which lead to winning the war. Let me say this again for the deaf fuckers that read here...WE WON THE WAR. And we did not stoop to the levels that Japanese did in order to win.

As President Obama went on to say, we cannot allow Al Qaeda to use things like Abu Ghraib or Gitmo as a recruiting tool. We need to take away as many notions as we can that we are ANYTHING like these psychotics. We aren't. We need to lead by example and I thank God that finally we have a president who represents those values in abundance and is now taking that message to the rest of the world.

I'll put up some clips of the event over this weekend.

Then Stop Acting Like It!

'member back in the campaign when the right blew a bowel after Barack Obama made the comment about "clinging to their guns and their religion?"

Check this out.

Discussion over.

Oh, Dick.....Dick, Dick, Dick

There has been much chiding of myself in comments regarding the idea that I can't "move on" from the Bush Cheney years. It's a nice little fantasy that the right, in typical fashion, has manufactured against the left in the pitiful attempt to deflect attention away from their criminal activities and complete incompetence of the last eight years. "See? He can't let go!" is their cry and it has played out on this blog just as it has in all of the rest of the media.

My initial response was that it is quite foolish of anyone, regardless of their political stripes, to simply ignore the effects of any administration's policies (bad or good) and pretend they never happened. The effects of what Dick and George did to this country will be felt for decades if not longer. So, sorry, but I will be continuing to talk about them along with the all of the latest and greatest current events which, to anyone who actually takes the time to think, have a large degree of relevance to decisions President Bush made.....SIX MONTHS AGO!

Of course, the truly funny part about all of this (and helping me out immensely) is that they don't want to go away either. Cheney, Rice, McCain et al have been hitting all the major chat shows over the last month so to say that the left won't "let it go" is quite hilarious....and hypocritical which shouldn't surprise anyone. What is even more funny is that our former VP, in his latest round of media appearances, may have fucked himself......really fucked himself. And I am here to tell all of you that I love it.

From CSM.

Crusading Spanish human rights judge Baltasar Garzón is now considering criminal charges against top Bush administration officials for the torture of five Spanish citizens held at Guantánamo Bay, Cuba. Judge Garzón's previous prosecution of Gen. Augusto Pinochet eventually resulted in the Chilean dictator's arrest in Britain.

OH NO HE DI-ENT!

So funny that I think I actually laughed off one of my testicles is the fact that none of the men named in Garzon's investigation may have to say a fucking thing about Cheney because Cheney himself WON'T FUCKING SHUT UP ABOUT IT!! In all of his interviews that he has given since his departure from DC, Dick has made it a point to essentially state that torture makes our country safer. In particular, President Obama's new policies (see: closing of Gitmo) have made our country prone to attack. "We must torture," he cries at the top of his lungs, "it worked for us!"

His family may want to to try to get him to check his ego in the lobby before he enters the theater and shut his fucking mouth because our ol' Buddy Richie might find hisself in the hoosegow. As of yet, Richard Bruce Cheney has not been named but Gonzalez and Yoo have been. How long do you suppose it will be before they start flapping their gums, as many top Bush administration officials already are about how frequently torture was used and, sadly, how none of it yielded any useful information? Could it be the we could see a time in the near future when former administration officials won't be able to travel due to fears of being arrested for war crimes? Hoo boy...I can't wait to see the right spin themselves out of this one which we all know they will:)

In sum, good readers, I wanted to go on record and make all of you a promise: as long as Dick's only conviction is his own vanity, I am going to talk about what he says on this blog. It might be a tough nut for some of you to swallow but, as our current president begins representing our country at this week's G-20 summit in London, the rest of you can probably see that we really have a lot of 'splainin' to do, Lucy!

Yep

I think cartoonist Victor Juhasz pretty much sums up our current state with this one. It goes along with the post below.

Here They Are

Chuck Woodsy, conservative poster on this blog, recently pointed me in the direction of the following this article and this list regarding how we got to this point in our economy. Chuck has now seen the light of day regarding what happens when the free market is allowed to butt fuck all of us sans lube.

The list of the Dirty Dozen intrigues me the most. Why? Because it neatly and clearly shows the actual people responsible for fucking over America as opposed to the "evil spirits" the right has manufactured out of their asses to jibe with their paranoid beliefs about "gubmint." Only two on the list are government officials (Rubin and Paulson) with two more being part of quasi government agencies (Greenspan and Cox). All four of these men were completely worthless and drank the free market Kool Aid.

A fifth is Phil Gramm, former Republican Senator from Texas who was the Senate Banking Chair from 1995-2000. Intelligent minds think alike as the list mentions Gramm-Leach-Bliley (as I have repeatedly) as being a major catalyst to our current situation. Strangely absent from the list is Barney Frank, the right wingers favorite whipping boy. Sorry righties. Frank may be a putz and a buffoon but he has nowhere near the power to do what has been done. Neither does our government for that matter.

But the rest of the list does. They are all CEOs of the biggest financial institutions in our government and I'd love to hear what all of you think after you read what they did. Take a look at people like Cassano, Weill, and Cayne. What is the difference between these fucks and Bernie Madoff? Zero. They were allowed by the dicks mentioned above as well as Presidents Clinton and Bush to rape and pillage as many villages as they could get their grubby mits on and destroy.

And righties? Please try to bring your "it's all the government's regulations" horse shit to the table now. It's always been weak to begin with and now all it does is further the point that you have absolutely nothing to offer anymore which essentially makes future Democratic victories in coming election years more likely.

Dead Cat Bounce?

A couple of weeks back at the gym, one of my conservative friends came running up to me.

"See, Mark? See? I told you Barack Obama would be a horrible president."
"How do you mean?" I asked.
"Look at the Dow. Wall Street doesn't like him."
"Yeah, but how much does the president really affect Wall Street?"
"Oh, they do."
"So when it dropped all that way under Bush...that was his fault too?"
"That was different. That was Barney Frank's fault."
"Ah, I see. But, ML (her initials) it just went up a little today. How do you explain that?"
"My husband-he's in banking and knows more than you-that's just the dead cat bounce. This market is dead. Obama is destroying the market and eventually he will destroy this economy with his socialist policies."

Yesterday, the Dow gained 500 points after two weeks of solid gains. As of this writing it is slightly up after starting low. As I often do in these situations, I defer to someone who knows more about the economy than I do (I am more of a foreign policy and political wonk)...Last In Line...who has told me quite often that the president doesn't really have that much to do with the state of Wall Street.

These days that might be a little less true but his main point is valid. I do wonder, though, if she will give our president at least some credit the next time I see her at the gym and ask her about that "dead cat bounce" thing...why it, like so many other things out of the mouths of the right, was a complete bag of shit.

Probably not.

Torture is Cool

Well, this is the one that really pissed me off. Is there ever going to be a time in this country when people DON'T believe dumb ass shit like this? Probably not

The fact of the matter is that torture does not work. The information you get from it is very unreliable and the only purpose it serves is to further the right wing's bizarre "violence makes my dick hard" fetish. I think they have a serious problem and should seek help.

While they are doing that, the rest of us can proceed in a fashion that actually elicits results. Take the example of my recently passed grandfather who told me that when he was involved with interrogations (Pacific Theater 1942-1945) they would simply dangle the carrot of a warm meal, water, sometimes a movie (!) and before you knew it, they'd get all kinds of information about Japanese troop positions. It nauseated him as a Christian to here what was going on down at Gitmo and in other prisons around the world. And he was a lifelong Republican!

Hell, these days, the dudes down at Gitmo are falling all over themselves to claim more credit for 9-11. We don't have to do shit.

No Need To Imagine

Before we move forward with more Dick (she said winking:)), a line from comments...

I can only imagine what the reaction would be had GWB made a quip like that about the special olympics. Baracks teleprompter has denied all responsibility.

First of all, let's put to rest the right wing bullshit myth that President Obama only speaks well with a teleprompter. Clearly, people that say that don't spend a lot of time watching him speak. So, I challenge those who believe this to watch 10 hours of President Obama speaking at events like he did yesterday (sans teleprompter), answering questions, on chat shows etc...Take notes and send me clips of his speech. I think you will find that it is not as bad as the myth you believe.

Second, let's also put to rest the bizarre right wing myth that if you make a mistake that somehow that means you are weak. President Obama has said on several occasions that he is only human and he makes mistakes. In fact, he speaks very plainly about his faults and how dunderheaded he can be. Last night was an example of that. He was insensitive and rude. Thus he apologized.

And the reason why you would never here a similar reaction if the same thing happened with Bush is because: a) He would never apologize because b) mistake? What mistake? To admit error is weak and weaklings shall perish in a sinful pit of boiling sewage.

Part 3 of Dick

Cheney on the Middle East...

The Chen-Ster Part Deux

More denial and bullshit....

Liberal Media Watch

Ah, the "liberal media." Here we have former VP Dick Cheney lobbed softball question after limp noodle question and essentially given a forum to air his bullshit. This is just Part 1!

A Giant Pile of Steaming...(Part 7 of 7)

The best for last, natch!

Scenario:
Pedro fails high school English.
1958 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.
2008 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state.
Newspaper articles appear nationally
explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist.
ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system
and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum.
Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up
mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

What a grand display of hyper inflated over exago bull crap. And, yes, FUCKING RACIST! This is the exact kind of bullshit that will piss me off no matter who the fuck is president. The fact that...and I know this is true because I hear about it every day from some of my conservative friends....these people think that if you don't learn English you end up mowing lawns is, without a doubt, the purest example of ego centrism combined with jingoism I have ever seen. Guess what, d bags? We aren't number one anymore largely thanks to the buffoon who occupied the oval office from 2001 to 2009. If any language should be learned, it's Chinese, not English.

"English banned from core curriculum?" Douche Bag Code for "Them firners are a comin'!"

"ACLU files...?" Douche Bag Code for "Please release your inner racist or you will be speaking firner soon."

"Newspaper articles appear nationally..." Douche Bag code for "All media are liberal commies who should be taken to camps and/or shot in the head."

"Pedro's cause is taken.." Douche Bag code for "Liberals are fascists who want to take your guns."

How much longer are we going to listen to this crap? People that say these types of things are fucking liars. Period. Liars who seek only to instill fear and fan rage.

The real reason why Pedro has failed high school English was that he was probably given a standardized test (see: No Child Left Behind) that has no sensitivity whatsoever to his learning style or his culturally diverse background. This essentially means that it is the worst fucking gauge of his actual intelligence.

In addition, his instructor was more than likely a lazy ass and did not pay attention to Pedro's differentiated learning style. If, instead of lecture, he had been taught in one of the other MILLION instructional strategies available to teachers, he would NOT have failed. Off the top of my head, if I have an ELL (English Language Learner) in one of my classes, I try to use as much audio and visual material as I can. I certainly don't stand up there and jabber away with an ego the size of a hot fucking air balloon while my students doodle, text, or pass out from boredom.

So, all of you...please...the next time you hear anything remotely like this, call the moron on their bullshit. Tell them to take a walk down Main Street and see who actually lives in our country now as opposed to the make believe land they have in their delusions.

A Giant Pile of Steaming....(Part 6 of 7)

More silliness...

Scenario:
Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee.
He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1958 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2008 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job.
She faces 3 years in State Prison.
Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.

Ok, this happens every day at my kid's school and no one is accused of being a sexual predator. In fact, I would wager that it goes on in most schools and this is just more "code" for psychology is a myth and if everyone just pulled themselves up by their boot straps, their lives would be fine.

A Giant Pile of Steaming....(Part 5 of 7)

This one is sort of vague.

Scenario:
Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July,
puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1958 - Ants die.
2008- BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called.
Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents,
siblings removed from home, computers confiscated,
Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list
and is never allowed to fly again.

I assume they mean at school? If not, this happens pretty much all summer long in my neighborhood and no one so much as lifts a finger.

A Giant Pile of Steaming...(part 4 of 7)

This one is just plain silly.

Scenario:

Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1958 - Mark shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2008 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations.
Car searched for drugs and weapons.

First of all, smoking dock? I asked everyone I know who was alive in 1958 if their school had a smoking dock and the answer from everyone was no. Teachers could smoke in the teacher's lounge but students got in trouble if they got caught with cigarettes.

As a parent, I can also relate that there are a wide variety of forms that parents can fill out to allow their kids to take aspirin, Tylenol, or anything else they might need. No police are called, no cars are searched, and no one is expelled.

The conceptual lens of people who think this way is in desperate need of an anti-bacterial wash.

A Giant Pile of Steaming...(Part 3 of 7)

Continuing with the email forward...

Scenario:
Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1958 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins.
Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2008 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark.
Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it

They shake hands and end up buddies? Seriously, is this person writing this email FROM the year 1958 and is his Dad named Ward Cleaver?

I showed my mom this and she laughed. As a principal, she told me what actually happens as opposed to what happens in ignorant over exago land.

No Swat team is called and no charges are filed. Both Johnny and Mark are shown to my mom's office. She asks them what happened. They both lie. Their parents are called in and told that the children are suspended for a day or more (depending upon the severity of the fight). They come back to school and avoid each other for awhile eventually becoming more concerned seeing the latest comic book movie.

A Giant Pile of Steaming...(Part 2 of 7)

Continuing on with the email forward I received from a friend.

Scenario:
Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car
and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1958 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal,
goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2008 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse.
Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang.
State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers
being abused herself and their dad goes to prison.
Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.

Actually, what 1958 should read is this:

Billy has a wide variety of mental and emotional issues related to the physical abuse his dad inflicted on him, fails to go to college or land a decent job, and grows up to abuse his own kids because that's WHAT ACTUALLY FUCKING HAPPENS IN THE REAL WORLD AS OPPOSED TO NEVER NEVER LAND!!!

The person who wrote this email clearly has never spent any time with abused children or adults and is completely lacking in any sort of knowledge of even rudimentary psychology and behavior development. To them, these fields are probably just "more liberal bullshit" which is quite apparent in their view of 2008. What a bunch of over exaggerated nonsense.

In addition, what's with the violence thing again? Seriously, I honestly think that people that view the world this way get off on beatings and death. It reminds me of the time I watched the Passion of the Christ a few years back. I was with some friends of mine who are very right wing Christians and, for many of them, it was their third or fourth time! Honestly, I could only watch Jesus Christ being beaten and mutilated once. It was sad and nauseating. They didn't seem to mind, though, as they were over taken by emotion and, strangely, almost seemed to enjoy it.

Put that together with how they seem to always have to find an enemy to blow up somewhere and it really makes you wonder. Maybe they might fit in just fine in Iran or Saudi Arabia.