Modern-Day Caligulas

The Roman emperor Caligula was notorious for his debauchery: he hosted orgies, turned the palace into a brothel, killed for amusement, and supposedly appointed his horse to the Senate of Rome.

Well, the people of South Carolina have done Caligula one better: they elected a horse's ass to the United States House of Representatives. Tuesday South Carolinians elected Mark Sanford in a special election to replace the congressman who was appointed to fill Jim DeMint's seat in the Senate.

Sanford was almost as notorious as Caligula: he conducted a years-long affair with a South American hottie, spent state money to see her, and told his staff he was hiking the Appalachian Trail when he was really seeing his mistress in Argentina. When caught he blathered about soul mates at press conferences and in TV interviews. His wife divorced him in short order after this most embarrassing and public betrayal, yet he had the gall to ask her to run his campaign when the House seat opened up earlier this year (he said he'd pay her this time!). He violated a court order keeping him off his ex-wife's property multiple times (he just admitted guilt and settled the complaint today). Even the national Republican Congressional Campaign Committee withdrew their support.

In short, Mark Sanford represents everything Republicans claim to hate: he violated the sanctity of his marital vows, he's a liar, a cheat, he stole state money, he shredded every bit of his dignity in the national spotlight, he eviscerated his own manhood with his weepy pronouncements, and he made South Carolina a mockery and the butt of endless jokes.

Dozens of elected officials have resigned from the House of Representatives for far more minor offenses, including numerous Republicans for extra-marital affairs, and even relatively tame offenses such as inappropriate Internet postings like Anthony Weiner tweeting pics of his weiner.

Yet South Carolinians have just elected a man who has no shred of dignity or shame. The crazy thing is, these people had a choice! Sanford had 16 opponents in the first Republican primary held a few months ago, but he survived that handily and Republican voters picked him in the runoff!

There's been a great deal of debate about Caligula's appointment of his horse to the Senate. Some say he was crazy, but others say he was simply showing his low opinion of the Senate.

Do the people of South Carolina hold the House of Representatives in such low regard that they elected an adulterer, a liar and a cheat? Did they elect him because their moral and ethical standards are as low as his? Did they elect him simply because they heard his name before? Did they elect him out of spite for the rest of the country?

Or did they elect him because he's a good old boy in the Republican money machine and all that talk about morals and ethics and responsibility is just a standard line of BS, and the Republican Party is just another criminal organization like the mafia where the currencies of power are loyalty, intimidation and violence?

My money is on the last.

From now on, any time a Republican starts talking about "character" and "Republican Party" in the same sentence, just saying "Mark Sanford" should shut them right up.

One thing is for sure: Mark Sanford will embarrass South Carolina many times again.